The Subconscious Stories That Shape Our Reality
- Tori Tatum
- Nov 5
- 2 min read
Have you ever noticed how, no matter how much you grow, certain emotional patterns still seem to find you — feeling unseen, unappreciated, or misunderstood?
Often, these moments aren’t coincidences. They’re reflections of deeper stories that live within the subconscious mind — old emotional programs still trying to protect you, even as they recreate the very pain you’re trying to move beyond.
At Counseling Reimagined, we help people work beneath the surface — not to assign blame, but to understand how subconscious protection can show up as projection, control, or withdrawal when what we truly long for is safety and belonging.
How the Past Replays in the Present
Neuroscience tells us that around 95% of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are guided by the subconscious. That means most of our reactions are not new — they’re remembered.
When something in the present moment brushes against an old wound, the nervous system leaps into action. Without realizing it, we start viewing today through yesterday’s lens.
Someone who once felt excluded might unconsciously look for proof that they don’t belong — even in caring environments.The subconscious whispers, “See, it’s happening again.”
It’s not sabotage. It’s self-protection.
The Role of Projection
Projection isn’t a flaw — it’s a sign of an unhealed story.When we haven’t yet made peace with certain emotions, they often appear as the stories we tell about others:
“They don’t care about me.”“They made me feel small.”“They crossed a boundary.”
These narratives usually began long before the current situation. The power of awareness is that once we see them, we can choose to rewrite them.
Meeting the Root Instead of the Reaction
Change begins when we pause before reacting and ask:
“What is this moment really reminding me of?”
That single question invites compassion — for ourselves and for others.Instead of trying to defend or prove, we can tend to the younger parts of us that still believe love or belonging must be earned.
When we bring presence to those parts, projection softens.What once felt like conflict becomes an invitation for clarity, connection, and healing.
Reprogramming the Old Narrative
You can begin reprogramming the subconscious by gently noticing when your reactions feel bigger than the situation at hand.
Try this:
Pause and breathe when you feel triggered — give your body time to arrive in the present.
Journal from curiosity rather than criticism: “What is this reaction trying to teach me?”
Practice self-forgiveness for the moments you’ve acted from pain instead of peace.
The more safety your body feels now, the less it needs to recreate the past.
Remembering Who You Are
Subconscious work isn’t about fixing yourself — it’s about remembering yourself.It’s the art of turning inward with compassion so that old patterns no longer have to run the sahow.
When you meet your inner stories with understanding, you don’t just change your behavior — you change your relationship with life itself.
At Counseling Reimagined, we specialize in helping people uncover and reprogram the subconscious patterns that block connection, peace, and authentic self-expression.
If this resonates with you, we’d love to help you explore the stories beneath your reactions — and find freedom on the other side of awareness.
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